September 9th, 2014

The night before the 9th, I had a hard time sleeping. This was going to be the first Nash Day that would fall on a weekday. It also was the third Nash Day. Nash’s Facebook page had been quiet for a while. I wasn’t writing as many blogs. I could feel the momentum dying down. I had been trying to prepare myself for this day. The first 9th I would wake up and not see people celebrating his short life. Todd had even said to me, “Honey, don’t be sad if you don’t see people doing things for Nash Day. We can’t expect they will do this forever.” He was right, I have thought the same thing many times. I wasn’t ready though. I wasn’t ready for it to stop. When I woke up on the 9th, I didn’t even look at my phone. I got in the shower and told myself, “No matter what, I’m always celebrating Nash day.” As I was getting ready to head out of the house to do my Nash Day pay it forwards, I couldn’t take it. I grabbed my phone. It was 10:00 am, I knew if there were posts there wouldn’t be many. My friend Natalie even said, “Remember it’s a week day, most people will do stuff when they are out of work.” It seemed like everyone was trying to prepare me for it to be small in comparison to the last two Nash Days. I looked at Facebook and screamed! I had a smile from ear to ear. At least 25 posts already. Kids taking cookies to their teachers. People paying it forward at the drive thru. People bringing mums to their neighbors or unexpected strangers. Then my favorite posts started coming in. The recipients of the acts. One lady had lost her grandmother that morning. When she went through the drive thru, her coffee was paid for and she was given a picture of my baby. She took the time to post his story on her page and how much it meant to her.It really makes you think about other people and what they may be going through. The lady in front of her one had no idea she lost her grandmother that morning. One small gesture brought a smile to someone who needed it. All in honor of Nash. That makes me one proud momma.

I used to watch the news every morning before work. So many horrible things in this world. So many bad people. I would look at Nash and feel selfish. What kind of world did I bring him into? All because I wanted to be a mother. Since Nash passed, so many people have reached out to me. Some I have never met. Some I have had differences with in the past, family members I had differences with and was barely speaking to. Almost all reached out to me and said they were here if I ever needed anything. All celebrate Nash day. I have learned through all of this that the majority of people are good, regardless of differences. People have good hearts. It takes a lot to swallow your pride and write to someone that you may not like. Tell them you are thinking of them daily and praying that they find peace. It’s moving. One thing I know that I can promise this baby, that I thought I couldn’t promise Nash, is that the world is full of good people. Yes, there are always going to be a few that give us all a bad name. The good overpower them every time though. People come together during tragedies. Some people think it’s sad. Why does it take a tragedy to be kind? My answer to this is that it doesn’t. It takes a tragedy for people to be noticed doing something kind. People do wonderful things everyday. Nash gives them a way to be noticed for it. To show that there are good people in this world. To give people hope. Not bad for a five-month-old angel.

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2 thoughts on “September 9th, 2014

  1. I have been reading your blog since you started it. My husband, kids and I live in Gaylord now but are originally from Flushing. I saw Nash’s story on Facebook and was instantly drawn to his beautiful face and the heartbreaking story that followed. I blubber my way through your entries weekly and think of you and your husband every time I pass a baby boy. You both are truly special human beings and have touched so many lives. I’m so happy you have the opportunity to be new parents again because you have a lot to offer a child. I’ll be participating in Nash Day on October 9th up here and will continue to do so. Nash is truly an angel! Thanks so much for sharing him with all of us. 💕💕💕

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  2. I have been reading your blogs ever since my niece told me about your incredible little boy Nash. I sit here with tears running down my face while I read trying to understand why this had to happen and thanking God that I have not had to walk in your shoes. Your family is truly an inspiration to me. What you have had to face and deal with is horrific yet you have done it with grace, strength and faith. I live in Frankenmuth Mi. and would love to start something up here in honor of Nash, in regards to the “Have a Nash Day and Pay It Forward” campaign. I just recently (2 weeks ago) became a grandmother for the first time and I look at my beautiful little angel baby and thank God that she is alright. I am so grateful for what I have …but realize after reading your story, how quickly things can change. Please send me any information I will need to do something for Nash’s day on Oct. 9th. Thanks for sharing your incredible story and journey with us…and for allowing us to be part of what is a very personal experience for you.

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